If He Had Been with Me

02Why do teenage friendships change?

Remember those carefree days of middle school, when your best friend was your partner in crime, your confidante, your rock? Then high school happened. Suddenly, you found yourself navigating a new world of cliques, popularity contests, and social pressures. And your once inseparable friendship? It started to change, to drift apart. This is a story many of us can relate to, and it's also the story of Autumn and Finny in Laura Nowlin's "If He Had Been with Me". High school is a significant transition period, a time when we start to figure out who we are and where we fit in. For Autumn and Finny, this transition marked the beginning of their drift. They were childhood best friends, but high school placed them in different social circles. Autumn found herself among the popular crowd, while Finny was more of a loner. This shift in social circles played a significant role in the evolution of their friendship. In the high school ecosystem, social status is a big deal. It can shape friendships, influence behaviors, and even dictate who you spend your time with. Autumn and Finny's diverging social statuses created a rift between them. They were no longer the carefree kids who spent summers together; they were now teenagers navigating the complexities of high school life. And boy, can teenage friendships be complex! They're not just about shared interests or history anymore. They're influenced by external factors like popularity and peer pressure. Autumn, being part of the popular crowd, felt these pressures acutely. She started changing, conforming to the expectations of her new friends, and this affected her relationship with Finny. Peer pressure is a powerful force in high school. It can make you do things you wouldn't normally do, say things you wouldn't normally say. For Autumn, it meant distancing herself from Finny to fit in with her new friends. This is a common scenario in teenage friendships, where the desire to belong can sometimes overshadow the value of old friendships. But these changes don't come without an emotional toll. Autumn and Finny's growing apart was painful, filled with confusion and longing. Changes in social status can lead to feelings of loss, guilt, and distress. It's a tough pill to swallow, realizing that the person you once shared everything with is now just a familiar stranger. So, why do teenage friendships change? It's a combination of factors - the transition to high school, the influence of social circles, the pressures of popularity, and the emotional complexities of adolescence. But perhaps the most poignant reason is this: as we grow and change, so do our friendships. They reflect our journey, our struggles, our triumphs. And while it can be painful to drift apart, it's also a part of growing up, a testament to our ever-evolving selves. In the end, teenage friendships are a beautiful mess - a mix of laughter, tears, love, and heartbreak. They're a mirror to our adolescent selves, a reminder of who we were, and a hint of who we're becoming.

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