
Rising Strong
Dr. Brené Brown
What's inside?
Explore the process of overcoming life's obstacles, learning from failures, and using these experiences to fuel personal growth and transformation.
You'll learn
Key points
01To feel more love and joy, you gotta let your guard down
Let's talk about vulnerability. It's a word that often gets a bad rap, associated with fear and weakness. But what if I told you that vulnerability is actually the key to love, belonging, and joy? Sounds a bit backwards, right? But that's exactly what Dr. Brené Brown believes. First, let's get clear on what vulnerability means in this context. It's not about being a pushover or letting people walk all over you. No, vulnerability here is about having the guts to show your true colors, warts and all. It's about letting people see your fears, your doubts, and your insecurities. It's about being real, even when it's scary or uncomfortable. So, why is being vulnerable so important? Well, according to Dr. Brown, when we hide our true selves, we're putting up walls. And these walls stop us from making deep, meaningful connections with others. These connections are what love and belonging are all about. By being vulnerable, we're letting people see us for who we really are, which helps them understand us, empathize with us, and ultimately, love us. But it's not just about love and belonging. Being vulnerable also leads to joy. When we're open about our fears and insecurities, we're giving ourselves the green light to fully experience our emotions. This includes the good stuff too, like joy. By letting ourselves feel joy without worrying about it being snatched away, we can truly appreciate and savor the happy moments in our lives. Dr. Brown shares some powerful real-life examples to back up her ideas. She tells stories of people who've faced big challenges and tough times, but have found love, belonging, and joy by being brave enough to be vulnerable. These stories show us that while being vulnerable might be uncomfortable, it's also a source of strength and resilience. To help us understand this better, Dr. Brown breaks it down into three steps: The Reckoning, The Rumble, and The Revolution. The Reckoning is about recognizing our emotions and admitting that we're feeling vulnerable. The Rumble is about digging deep into our feelings and figuring out the stories behind them. And The Revolution? That's about changing the way we live and interact with others based on what we've learned about our emotions and vulnerabilities. So, to wrap it up, Dr. Brené Brown's idea that vulnerability is the key to love, belonging, and joy is really a call to be true to ourselves, flaws and all. By doing this, we can make deeper connections with others, experience real happiness, and live more authentic and fulfilling lives.
02Messing up can lead to two bad things
In Brené Brown's world, there are two big pitfalls when it comes to dealing with failure: "Gold plating grit" and suffering from a "Badassery deficit". Let's break these down. First up, "Gold plating grit". Imagine you've got a rough, unpolished stone. You slap a thin layer of gold paint on it and voila, it looks shiny and valuable. But underneath, it's still the same old stone. This is what we do when we gloss over our failures without really digging into the nitty-gritty of what went wrong. Say you start a business and it flops. It's easy to shrug it off and say, "Well, I gave it a shot," without really looking into why it didn't work out. Maybe you didn't do enough market research, or your financial planning was off, or your marketing strategy didn't hit the mark. By just gold plating the grit, you're skipping the tough part of self-reflection and missing out on lessons that could stop you from making the same mistakes again. Next, we have the "Badassery deficit". This is when we dodge the discomfort and vulnerability that come with failure, and we're not honest about what we've been through. It's like not having the guts to face our failures and share them with others. Picture a student who flunks a big exam. Instead of owning up to it, they might make excuses or blame things like the exam being too hard or not having enough time to study. This is a badassery deficit because they're sidestepping the awkwardness of admitting they failed and the vulnerability of showing their weak spots. We live in a world where we cheer for success and sweep our failures under the rug. We love a good comeback story, but we're not so keen on the messy, painful process of failing and picking ourselves back up. But Brené Brown tells us that the only way to truly rise strong is to face our failures head-on. She tells us that being brave isn't about dodging failure or discomfort, but about tackling them with honesty and resilience. It's about saying when we're hurt, asking for help when we need it, and learning from our slip-ups. It's about realizing that failure isn't a sign of weakness, but a stepping stone to growth and success. So, according to Brené Brown, the two big no-nos when it comes to failure are gold plating grit and having a badassery deficit. Both stop us from really understanding and learning from our failures. But we can beat both by being vulnerable, facing discomfort, and being honest about our experiences.

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03To bounce back stronger, you gotta take risks and be okay with falling
04Learn from your mistakes and hurts to become wiser and more genuine
05Deal with your feelings by acknowledging and exploring them
06Write down your feelings as you experience them - it helps!
07Challenge your expectations to become more forgiving
08Owning up to your mistakes can mend work relationships, even when things are tough
09Conclusion
About Dr. Brené Brown
Dr. Brené Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston, renowned for her work on vulnerability, courage, empathy, and shame. She is a New York Times bestselling author and her TED talk on vulnerability is one of the most viewed in the world.