
The Crossroads of Should and Must
Elle Luna
What's inside?
Explore the journey between choosing what you feel obligated to do and what you truly desire, and learn how to follow your passion for a more fulfilling life.
You'll learn
Key points
01Understanding the Difference Between 'Should' and 'Must' in Life
You're standing at a crossroads. One path is paved with 'Shoulds', the other with 'Musts'. The 'Should' path is lined with signs pointing out societal expectations, obligations, and norms. It's the path most people take, the one that's safe, predictable, and comfortable. The 'Must' path, on the other hand, is less traveled. It's the path of your personal calling, your passion, your dreams. It's risky, uncertain, and full of challenges. Which path do you choose? 'Should' and 'Must' are two powerful forces that shape our lives. 'Should' is like a chameleon, constantly changing its color to blend in with societal norms and expectations. It's the voice in your head that says, "You should get a stable job", "You should get married by 30", or "You should buy a house". 'Must', on the other hand, is like a compass, always pointing towards your true north. It's the voice in your heart that says, "You must write that book", "You must start that business", or "You must travel the world". The choices we make between 'Should' and 'Must' have profound impacts on our lives. Choosing 'Should' often leads to a life of conformity, dissatisfaction, and regret. It's like choosing to stay in a cage, safe but confined. Choosing 'Must', however, can lead to a life of fulfillment, joy, and authenticity. It's like choosing to fly, risky but liberating. For instance, consider the story of Elle Luna herself, who left her successful career in a tech startup to pursue her passion for art. It was a risky move, but it led her to a life of authenticity and fulfillment. Understanding the difference between 'Should' and 'Must' is crucial for authentic decision-making. It's like having a map and a compass in the wilderness of life. Without them, we can easily get lost in the forest of societal expectations and lose sight of our true north. But with them, we can navigate our way towards our true calling, even if it means going off the beaten path. It's empowering to choose 'Must' over 'Should', to choose authenticity over conformity, to choose passion over obligation. Choosing between 'Should' and 'Must' is not a one-time decision, but a continuous process. It requires self-reflection, courage, and resilience. It's like climbing a mountain, where each step is a choice between the easy path of 'Should' and the challenging path of 'Must'. Here's a simple guide to help you in this process: First, identify your 'Shoulds' and 'Musts'. Second, evaluate the consequences of choosing each. Third, listen to your heart and choose the one that aligns with your true self. Finally, have the courage to follow through, even if it means facing challenges and uncertainties. In conclusion, understanding and choosing between 'Should' and 'Must' is a crucial part of living an authentic life. It's about listening to your heart, following your passion, and daring to be different. So, the next time you stand at the crossroads of 'Should' and 'Must', remember this: Choosing 'Must' may be risky, but the reward is a life of authenticity, fulfillment, and joy.
02How 'Shoulds' limit your potential?
You're sitting at your desk, staring at the computer screen, and the clock ticks away. You're in a job that pays the bills, but it doesn't light a fire in your soul. You've always dreamed of being a painter, but you chose a career in finance because that's what your parents expected. This is a classic example of a 'Should' - a societal expectation, family pressure, or personal fear that dictates our life choices. 'Shoulds' are born from various sources. Society often tells us that we should pursue certain careers because they're stable, lucrative, or prestigious. Think about how many times you've heard that you should be a doctor, lawyer, or engineer to be successful. Family pressures can also create 'Shoulds'. Maybe your family has a long line of doctors, and you feel obligated to continue the tradition. Personal fears, like the fear of failure or rejection, can also lead to 'Shoulds'. You might avoid pursuing your passion for writing because you're afraid your work won't be good enough or people won't like it. These factors shape our perception of what we should be doing in our lives, often limiting our potential. 'Shoulds' create a narrow path for us to follow, limiting our exploration of other possibilities. For instance, if you've always been told that you should be a lawyer, you might never consider the possibility of being a chef, even if you love cooking. Following 'Shoulds' can lead to dissatisfaction and unfulfillment. You might be successful in your law career, but if your heart yearns to be in the kitchen, you'll likely feel a void in your life. 'Shoulds' often represent what others want for us, not what we want for ourselves. They can create a conflict between our personal interests and desires. Imagine the joy and fulfillment you could experience if you pursued your passion for cooking instead of following the 'Should' of being a lawyer. You might not make as much money, but you'd likely feel more satisfied and fulfilled in your work. Overcoming 'Shoulds' is crucial for personal growth and fulfillment. Recognizing and understanding the origin of your 'Shoulds' is the first step. Ask yourself why you feel you should do something. Is it because of societal expectations, family pressures, or personal fears? Questioning your 'Shoulds' can help you consider whether they align with your passions and desires. Strategies for breaking free from 'Shoulds' include setting boundaries with others, practicing self-compassion, and pursuing your passions, even if they scare you. Remember, growth often happens outside of our comfort zones. 'Shoulds' can limit your potential, but they don't have to define your life. Reflect on your 'Shoulds' and consider whether they align with your true passions. Challenge your 'Shoulds', pursue your passions, and watch as your life transforms in ways you never thought possible.

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03What's pursuing your 'Must' all about?
04How to transition from 'Should' to 'Must'?
05Why choosing 'Must' over 'Should' leads to fulfillment?
06Navigating the Crossroads of 'Should' and 'Must': Inspiring Stories of Self-Discovery and Passion Pursuit
07Conclusion
About Elle Luna
Elle Luna is an American designer, painter, and writer known for her book "The Crossroads of Should and Must". She has worked with IDEO and startups including Mailbox, and her artwork has been exhibited in galleries and museums. Luna's work emphasizes the importance of pursuing personal passion.