
The Lost Art of Connecting
Susan McPherson
What's inside?
Discover the powerful method of gather, ask, do to build meaningful business relationships, and learn how to connect with others in a more authentic and rewarding way.
You'll learn
Key points
01How to effectively gather contacts for business relationships?
In the world of business, relationships are everything. But how do you build a network that's not just wide, but also deep and meaningful? The answer lies in the art of 'Gathering', a concept beautifully illustrated by Susan McPherson in her book "The Lost Art of Connecting". Gathering, in this context, is not about amassing a large number of contacts. It's about being selective and intentional in choosing who you connect with. It's about curating a network that's diverse, inclusive, and most importantly, relevant to your professional goals. A diverse network is like a treasure trove of perspectives and ideas. It's a melting pot of different experiences, backgrounds, and skill sets. When you have a diverse network, you're exposed to a wide range of viewpoints that can help you think outside the box, solve problems creatively, and make informed decisions. An inclusive network, on the other hand, is one that provides opportunities for everyone, regardless of their status or position. It's a network where everyone feels valued and heard, and where everyone has the chance to contribute and grow. But how do you ensure that your network is not just diverse and inclusive, but also relevant to your professional goals? The key is to connect with people who share your interests, align with your goals, or complement your skills. These are the people who can contribute to your professional development and career advancement. They are the ones who can provide you with valuable insights, advice, and opportunities that are directly related to your field or industry. So, how do you go about gathering these contacts? There are several strategies you can employ. One is attending industry events, where you can meet and interact with professionals in your field. To make the most of these opportunities, be proactive in starting conversations, asking questions, and exchanging contact information. Another strategy is leveraging social media platforms. You can use these platforms to reach out to and engage with potential contacts. You can share your thoughts and ideas, participate in discussions, and show your expertise and passion in your field. Professional networking sites, like LinkedIn, are also great tools for gathering contacts. You can use these sites to find and connect with professionals in your field or industry. You can join groups, participate in discussions, and reach out to people who can potentially become part of your network. But remember, gathering contacts is not just about adding names to your contact list. It's about building meaningful relationships. So, when you connect with someone, take the time to get to know them. Show genuine interest in their work and their ideas. Be open, be curious, and be willing to learn from them. In conclusion, gathering is a crucial step in building meaningful business relationships. It's about curating a network that's diverse, inclusive, and relevant. It's about connecting with people who can contribute to your professional growth and success. So, start gathering contacts intentionally and strategically. Your network is your net worth, after all.
02The Art of Asking and Listening in Relationship Building
Ever been in a conversation where you felt like you were talking to a brick wall? Or perhaps you've been on the other side, where you were the one doing all the talking, but the other person seemed disinterested or distracted. These scenarios are all too common, and they highlight the importance of two key skills in relationship building: asking the right questions and active listening. In Susan McPherson's book, "The Lost Art of Connecting," she emphasizes the power of asking the right questions. It's not about asking generic questions like "How are you?" or "What do you do?" but rather, asking specific questions that show genuine interest in the other person. These questions can help you understand their needs, interests, and goals. For instance, asking a new acquaintance about their passion project or what they love most about their job can open up a deeper conversation and foster a stronger connection. But asking the right questions is only half the battle. The other half is active listening. Active listening is not just about hearing the words that are being said, but also understanding the tone and non-verbal cues. It's about showing engagement and interest in the conversation. When you actively listen, you're not just waiting for your turn to speak, but you're fully present in the conversation, showing the other person that you value what they have to say. McPherson also introduces the concept of empathetic communication, which is the key to deeper relationships. Empathetic communication is about understanding and sharing the feelings of others. It's about showing care for others' feelings and experiences. When you communicate empathetically, you're not just acknowledging the other person's feelings, but you're also validating them. This can create a safe space for open and honest communication, which can strengthen the relationship. So, how can you apply these principles of asking and listening in your own relationships? Start by being more intentional with your questions. Instead of asking generic questions, try to ask more specific ones that can help you understand the other person better. Practice active listening by being fully present in the conversation and showing genuine interest in what the other person has to say. And finally, communicate empathetically by understanding and sharing the feelings of others. In conclusion, asking the right questions, active listening, and empathetic communication are crucial in relationship building. They can help you understand the needs, interests, and goals of others, show engagement and interest, and create a safe space for open and honest communication. So, the next time you're in a conversation, remember to ask, listen, and empathize. You might be surprised at how much deeper your relationships can become.

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03Taking Action: The Key to Strengthening Business Relationships
04How to build meaningful business relationships?
05The Future of Networking and Relationship-Building in Business
06Conclusion
About Susan McPherson
Susan McPherson is a corporate responsibility expert, speaker, and serial connector. She is the founder and CEO of McPherson Strategies, a consultancy focusing on the intersection of brands and social impact. She has over 25 years of experience in marketing, public relations, and sustainability communications.