You Are Your Best Thing

02What's intergenerational trauma and how does it affect Black Americans? It's trauma passed down from generation to generation, rooted in slavery and racism. Recognizing and dealing with this trauma is key to healing

Intergenerational trauma is a heavy term, but it's a real thing. It's the idea that trauma can be passed down from one generation to the next. This is especially true for the Black community in America, where years of systemic racism, discrimination, and violence have left deep psychological wounds that still affect people today. One of the main themes in Tarana Burke and Brene Brown's collection of personal stories is the feeling of shame and isolation that many Black folks feel, especially when they're the only Black person in a predominantly white space. Take the story of Prentis Hemphill, a therapist and writer. Hemphill's parents sent her to a mostly white school, hoping she'd have better opportunities. But instead, she ended up feeling alone and different, being the only Black student in her class. To fit in, Hemphill started pretending to have the same experiences as her white classmates, like shopping at the same stores or living in the same neighborhoods. When she faced racial comments or name-calling, she learned to hide her feelings and ignore the insults. This taught Hemphill that her true identity was something to be hidden, a weight to be carried. This feeling of shame and the need to hide one's true self can make Black folks reject parts of their own culture and heritage. Luvvie Ajayi Jones, a writer and speaker who moved to America from Nigeria when she was nine, shares a similar story. In her new American school, Jones found that her real name, Ifeoluwa, was hard for her classmates to say and made them uncomfortable. To fit in, she started introducing herself as "Lovette," a name that eventually became Luvvie. She also changed her Nigerian accent and asked her mom to make sandwiches for lunch instead of traditional Nigerian food. Jones felt she had to hide her real self to avoid standing out and having to constantly explain her differences. Then there's the story of Keah Brown, a writer and activist who is both Black and disabled. Brown always embraced her Black identity, but she was very aware of her difference due to her disability. When a classmate made fun of her for walking with a limp, Brown felt a deep sense of shame that affected her self-esteem and body image. It took her many years to rebuild her self-worth and resist the shame that society projected onto her. These stories show the deep impact of intergenerational trauma on Black folks. The shame and isolation they feel aren't just one-off incidents, but part of a larger pattern of systemic racism and discrimination. This trauma is passed down from generation to generation, affecting the mental health and well-being of Black folks today.

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