Breathe Like a Bear
Kira Willey
39 min
8 Key Points
4.7 RateWhat's inside?
Explore 30 simple, fun mindfulness practices designed to help kids stay calm, focused, and relaxed in any situation, anywhere and anytime.
You'll learn
1. Fun mindfulness games for kids2. Stress-busting techniques3. Boosting focus and concentration4. Healthy ways to express feelings5. Being present in daily life6. Building a positive mindset.Key points
01Unlocking the Hidden Power of Breath
Have you ever watched a child spiral into a state of complete overwhelm and felt entirely helpless to stop it? We live in an era where children are constantly bombarded by external stimuli, from the flashing screens of digital devices to heavily structured academic and extracurricular schedules. This rapid pace leaves very little room for their developing nervous systems to process the world around them. As a result, we are seeing unprecedented levels of anxiety, restlessness, and emotional dysregulation in early childhood. When a child is caught in the grip of a powerful emotion like anger, frustration, or fear, simply telling them to calm down rarely works. The logical part of their brain has essentially shut off, hijacked by the primal fight-or-flight response. This is precisely where the profound brilliance of Kira Willey's approach comes into play. She identifies the one autonomic function we can consciously control—our breath—and turns it into a secret weapon for emotional stability. To truly appreciate the value of this methodology, we must first dispel the common myths surrounding mindfulness. When we hear the word mindfulness, many of us picture a highly disciplined monk sitting perfectly still on a mountaintop for hours on end, completely detached from the material world. Naturally, expecting a hyperactive five-year-old to replicate this is a recipe for frustration. Willey shatters this unrealistic expectation by redefining mindfulness for children. In her framework, mindfulness is not about emptying the mind or sitting rigidly in silence; rather, it is about anchoring the attention to the present moment for just a few seconds at a time. It is a highly active, engaging process. By pairing deep breathing with playful physical movements and vivid imagery, she completely bypasses the child's resistance to sitting still. The exercises are short, dynamic, and designed to be integrated seamlessly into the messy reality of everyday life. Consider the profound mind-body connection that dictates our emotional states. When we feel stressed, our breathing automatically becomes shallow and rapid, heavily concentrated in the upper chest. This shallow breathing signals the brain that we are in danger, pumping cortisol and adrenaline into the bloodstream. Conversely, when we take slow, deep breaths that expand the diaphragm, we stimulate the vagus nerve. This remarkable nerve acts as the body's braking system, sending an immediate signal to the brain that the environment is safe, which in turn activates the parasympathetic nervous system. Heart rates slow down, blood pressure drops, and muscles relax. By teaching children how to manipulate their breathing, we are literally handing them the remote control to their own nervous systems. They learn that they do not have to be passive victims of their emotional storms; they have a built-in biological tool to self-soothe. What makes this book particularly revolutionary is its emphasis on accessibility. You do not need a quiet yoga studio, specialized equipment, or an hour of free time to practice these techniques. The exercises are specifically designed to be performed anywhere, at any time. Whether you are stuck in a frustrating traffic jam, waiting in a long line at the grocery store, or sitting in a chaotic classroom before a difficult math test, these tools are instantly available. The author categorizes the breathing exercises into five distinct functional areas: calming down, focusing, imagining, generating energy, and relaxing. This brilliant categorization allows parents and educators to select the precise tool needed for a specific emotional crisis. It transforms mindfulness from an abstract philosophical concept into a highly practical, on-the-spot intervention. Furthermore, introducing these concepts early in life builds a foundation of emotional intelligence that will serve children long into adulthood. When kids learn to identify their internal states—recognizing when their bodies feel tight, when their minds are racing, or when their energy is too erratic—they develop profound self-awareness. This self-awareness is the cornerstone of empathy, effective communication, and healthy relationships. By practicing these playful breathing exercises together, adults and children also create a shared language for discussing difficult emotions. Instead of demanding that a child stop crying, a parent can gently suggest trying one of their favorite animal breaths. This subtle shift transforms the adult from an enforcer of rules into a supportive partner in the child's emotional regulation journey. As we explore the specific techniques in the upcoming chapters, you will see exactly how this shared practice can dramatically lower the temperature of household conflicts and foster a deep sense of connection.
02Taming the Fierce Inner Storm
Think back to the last time you witnessed a child having a full-blown meltdown. The tears are streaming, the fists are clenched, and the volume is deafening. In these intense moments of crisis, the child's brain is completely overwhelmed by a flood of stress hormones, making logical reasoning impossible. The "Be Calm" section of the book tackles this exact scenario head-on, providing rapid-response breathing techniques designed to de-escalate the nervous system before a small frustration turns into a massive explosion. The core objective here is not to invalidate the child's feelings or force them to suppress their anger, but rather to give them a physical pathway to process that intense energy safely. By focusing on deep, intentional exhales, these exercises act as a powerful fire extinguisher for the brain's alarm system. One of the most effective and beloved exercises in this category is the Hot Chocolate breath. Consider how beautifully simple and relatable this imagery is for a young child. You ask the child to cup their hands together as if they are holding a steaming mug of rich, delicious hot chocolate. First, they take a long, deep breath in through their nose to smell the sweet, chocolaty aroma. Then, because the drink is much too hot to sip, they must purse their lips and blow out very slowly and gently through their mouth to cool it down. This process is repeated several times. The brilliance of this exercise lies in its hidden physiological mechanics. By encouraging a slow, controlled exhale, it directly engages the parasympathetic nervous system, instantly lowering the heart rate. Furthermore, by giving the child a specific physical action holding the imaginary mug and a sensory visualization smelling the chocolate, it completely distracts their mind from the trigger that caused the upset in the first place. Another brilliant tool in the calming arsenal is the Candle breath. Kids love birthdays, and the imagery of blowing out a candle is universally understood. However, the twist here is teaching the child breath control. Instead of a quick, forceful puff that blows the candle out immediately, the child is instructed to blow just hard enough to make the imaginary flame flicker and dance, but not hard enough to extinguish it. This requires intense concentration and a highly regulated, extended exhalation. When a child is vibrating with anger or anxiety, their breath is typically erratic and shallow. The Candle breath forces them to slow everything down, commanding their body to return to a state of equilibrium. It is a perfect exercise for those moments of pre-school jitters, separation anxiety at the classroom door, or the frustration of a toy not working properly. Key strategies for implementing the "Be Calm" exercises: Intervene Early: The best time to suggest a calming breath is when you first notice the warning signs of frustration—the heavy sighs, the furrowed brow, the clenched jaw. Once a child has crossed the threshold into a full tantrum, their ability to follow instructions is severely compromised. Catching the emotion early is crucial. Model the Behavior: Children are incredibly perceptive and will mirror your energy. If you urgently and loudly demand that they do their Hot Chocolate breath, it will simply add to their stress. Instead, get down to their eye level, soften your voice, and begin doing the exercise yourself. Say softly, "I am feeling a little frustrated, so I am going to cool down my hot chocolate." They will naturally want to join you. Use Tactile Props: For very young children or those who struggle with purely imaginary concepts, you can use physical objects to anchor the practice. A real pinwheel or a dandelion provides immediate visual feedback on how their breath is working. As they master the concept with physical items, they can easily transition to using their imagination. Create a Safe Space: Associate these calming breaths with a feeling of safety. Do not use them as a punishment or a condition for getting what they want. The goal is self-soothing, not compliance. When they successfully calm down using the breath, praise their effort and acknowledge how much better their body must feel. The transition from chaos to calm is rarely instantaneous, but consistent practice builds a vital neurological pathway. Every time a child successfully navigates a moment of frustration using their breath, they are physically rewiring their brain. They are abandoning the default pathway of screaming and hitting, and strengthening the pathway of pausing and breathing. Over time, this conscious effort becomes an automatic reflex. The child who once threw toys in a rage begins to independently take a deep breath before reacting. This is the ultimate goal of the "Be Calm" techniques: to give children the profound realization that they possess the inner strength to weather their own emotional storms. They learn that feelings are temporary visitors, and they have the tools to help those intense feelings pass through without causing destruction.
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03Sharpening the Wandering Young Mind
04Unlocking Deep Creative Confidence
05Waking Up the Sluggish Body
06Letting Go of the Long Day
07Conclusion
About Kira Willey
Kira Willey is an award-winning children's music artist, kids' yoga expert, and mindfulness educator. She is known for her popular Rockin' Yoga school programs and music, and has released five albums of kids' yoga and mindfulness songs. Her work aims to help children manage their emotions and self-regulate.
